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Mental Health Monday

Following on from last weeks post, where I shared a quote I came across on social media, I thought it might be worth attempting a weekly posting along the same lines!

This one jumped out at me this week. I’ve heard advice along these lines before – in fact, I’ve recently worked on a ghostwriting project which addresses this very topic.

Why is it so easy to know something, yet still be unable to implement it?

We know that children model what they see. When we slip up and say a swear word in front of our toddler, they happily chirp it back at us. They ‘borrow’ our makeup, and love to copy us cleaning – only until a certain age I’m sure! My three year old regularly sits down at his imaginary laptop and types away doing his ‘working things.’

Daughters of abused women often become abused women themselves. It’s a pattern of modelled behaviour, and it’s up to us as parents to break the generational cycle for them.

Sometimes, that means putting yourself first.

Admittedly, I struggle with this. I rarely ever find time for my things. I sacrifice every little piece of me to make everyone else happy around me, and I don’t even leave scraps for myself.

My challenge to myself this year is to make time for myself, and show my children that I matter, too. I desperately don’t want them to grow up as self-sacrificing people-pleasers. There is nothing healthy about that.

It starts with me modelling self-love, self-care, and boundaries.

My needs matter. So do yours.

The first thing I want to start doing again is painting my nails. I used to love painting my nails every week. It would make me smile every time I caught sight of them – colourful, mood changing, and serving no purpose other than my enjoyment!

Tell me – what kind of things do you do for yourself?


13 responses to “Mental Health Monday”

  1. Reading is my lifeline. No matter how crazy life is, I have to carve out time to read every day. For this purpose, non-fiction/learning reading does not count. It must be fiction of whatever genre I’m into at that moment.

    Liked by 2 people

    • I absolutely agree, this is so important for me too, although I admittedly don’t make enough time for personal reading. I absolutely adore a supernatural romance, or a young adult fantasy adventure. What are you reading right now?

      Liked by 1 person

      • Just finished Apples Never Fall by Liam Moriarty, and about to start Hollywood Lied by Iris Carden, a fellow blogger! I read across most of the genres, love supernatural romance, YA, fantasy, you name it! What are you reading right now?

        Liked by 1 person

      • I am currently between books, I have a couple of indie author books I’ve bought and downloaded from people who follow me on twitter. I haven’t decided which one I’m going to start with yet. Reading is something else I’m struggling to find the time for, but I’m determined to get on top of my ne time!

        Liked by 1 person

      • This speaks directly to. One of the things that I learned about myself last year is that I can be up and down making things happen for everyone even at the expenseof my own health and peace. I don’t think twice about showing and sacrificing for the people I love and care or those I feel am responsible to. Not that it’s bad but I was missing something important too🤦‍♀️

        Last year it left me drained. I barely had time to rearrange my life and see to it that my personal development is not stagnant. I failed to dish myself the same grace, favor, love, time, respect, gifts and awards that I was dishing for everyone.

        So this year I have made the same resolution just like you 🤗 I have labeled it “My intentional journey to being selfish”.

        I deserve my love too. I Matter and I will see to it that I choose me first and give myself the confirmation and affirmation that I will need on my journey ❤

        Thank you for reminding me about me🤭

        Liked by 1 person

  2. To me self care is being open and truthful with yourself. Lowering the boundaries you’ve set in place to learn, grow and health 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

  3. as a father I always put my children’s needs first… much to my detriment, as my wife was constantly verbally abusive. When I finally left to be with my soul mate, I felt so guilty leaving that I couldn’t enjoy my new beautiful partner. My children however, showed me that my selflessness was reflected by their caring nature towards me. All three said that I had done the right thing for both myself ,them, and ultimately my ex-wife. I feel denying myself for them was the least I could do.

    Liked by 2 people

  4. I am starting to state to my toddler son (1 1/2 yr old) that I need alone time. For some reason parents have gotten the message that if you are not 100% present with your child you are being selfish.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Amazing, that’s a great age to start. Unconditional love with boundaries ❤️ it is not selfish to fill your cup first. If I offered you a drink and then tried to pour one from an empty bottle, I would look a fool. The same applies to parenting. There is nothing selfish about filling your cup first, otherwise what do you have to give? ❤️❤️


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